While there are many parenting books and on line resources available no child comes with a step by step guide to raising a happy, confident and empathic child.
My mother and I have been talking about what parents do to raise children who are compassionate and caring. My mother and father must have done something right seeing they have three children who have these qualities. We wonder about how this was accomplished and wonder if it is just from modeling of those behaviors. Perhaps it is that simple. Be a good person and your child will see that and learn to value being kind, compassionate, caring and empathic.
This week Sophia made me so proud. While I can not say we are totally responsible for this act of kindness I like to think we contributed to it. I have talked to Sophia about giving away things we don't need to people less fortunate. We donate clothing that no longer fits or things we no longer need to Goodwill or people in our community that are in need. We sponsor a child in China in an effort to give back.
This week Sophia called me up into her bedroom after being put to bed. She was holding a stuffed animal in her hand and told me that a child at daycare needed this so she was going to give it to him. She could not wait to go the next morning to give it to this child. The boy was not there the next day and I was sure she would change her mind once she brought it back home but she did not. She woke the next morning and could not wait to get to daycare to present her gift. I watched her as she gave it to this "baby." She glowed with pride, almost as much as I did.
Sophia loves giving gifts. She picks out the gift she wants to give. For my birthday she gave me a stuffed animal (a frog) which she now sleeps with. She gave Steve a car for father's day. She wanted to get him a baby doll but changed her mind when she got to the store. I see that she picks out things she likes in these gifts. The act of giving away one of her toys this week was totally self-less. She acted out compassion and nothing could make me prouder!
There is something to be said about modeling. We encourage Sophia to be independent and at times we talk her through tasks. Well the tables turned the other night when I put her to bed. She has been sleeping in her tent. I lay on the floor to read her stories. When I was getting up one night I asked her to help me up off the floor (she loves to help out.) She told me I could do it myself I just needed to try. She then talked me through getting up. "First roll over. Get on your knees. Now put one foot on the floor....." She encouraged the entire time telling me I could do it if I tried. When I did it she said, "I am so proud of you. You did it yourself!"
Life doesn't get better than this.
